I survived a roll over accident in my dad's half ton truck last night!  That is an experience I will surely never forget.  Everytime I think back on it I get a chill. 

It was quite embarassing but I'm thankful that I was the only person involved in the accident and came out in one piece.  I'm also thankful for the people who helped me get out of the vehicle.  As soon as I landed and realised I was upside down, I was very panicked.  When it happened, my heart was racing.  I was thinking about everything and once; worried that no one would stop for me but luckily I did not have to wait long. 

I was not sure I could get out of my seatbelt on my own.  I ended up cutting my hand digging through the snow to try and support myself once someone arrived to undo my seatbelt.  Afterwards I crawled out through the window.

I have several bruises and minor cuts, but I'm fine.  I look fine fully clothed, besides my hands.  My hands still have frost bite from the snow, but it's nothing major.  The deepest cut I had was in the middle of my palm, but it turned out to be fine once I allowed the blood to dry.

The police that arrived at the scene were nice... Until they asked for my information and realised I had a charge from last summer for possession of maurijuana.  I told them that I had done the necessarily actions for the discharge, the paperwork just hadn't been done yet.  I also told them I wasn't willing to talk about it any further and then endured lots of snide comments from the one officer.  I suspect he was trying to get a rise out of me, but after what had happened the last thing I wanted to do was argue with authority about why or why not I should be treated like a common criminal.  I just wanted to go home and get cleaned up.

There is more.  But nothing I feel like sharing.  I've done a lot of things the last year or so that I'm not proud of which contribute to their reasoning of treating me like a hoodlum.  I don't feel like a criminal, though I'm turning 21 and I realise it's time for me to make better decisions unless I want to head down shit creek.  Though there are lots of shitty laws and policies I don't agree with, it would be more productive to try and change them than commit them.

And then maybe I am being disrespectful sometimes.  But I've had 2 different experiences with police/conservation officers/RCMP based on different things.  Let's just say I was disappointed with the personalities/judgemental behaviour of quite a few of the people I had dealings with.  Everything is black or white for them and I will never respect that way of thinking.  It takes those kinds of people to become a part of authority, which is disappointing, but I can't do anything about it.

My dad's truck is totalled. I received a couple fines, I don't want to argue them, I'm just glad I'm OK.  I just want to get this chapter of my life closed.  I can't change the past, but I can learn from it and make wiser decisions.  Everytime a matter is closed, a new one opens up, with me it seems.  I just hope I do enough so that the next one doesn't look as bleak.

I need to move on however.  I could write more about the experience and how intense it was for me.  But until I can move on from this, I will try to keep it furthest from my mind.