So I fucked the guy that's 13 years older than me again a few days ago.  He's still the oldest guy I've ever fucked.  And then I fucked this guy last night that used to be my ex best friend's fuck buddy.  I've known him for over a year and he was trying to bang me since before they ever met, but I still do feel bad for screwing her leftovers.  Not bad for her or our friendship, I just mostly feel lame for fucking someone a friend already fucked.  Oh well, I was horny.  I didn't actually get the good dicking I wanted from the first guy so I had to make up for it somehow.

It was still pretty hot but I won't go into the details.  Although I've decided to cool it for a while.  I've come to know that I will never develop any mutual respect with these guys I fuck.  I don't want to follow in my fucked up friend's foot steps either.  I kind of already knew this, but I hoped it was just the people I was meeting.  I was hoping I'd make some new fuck buddies and I could have my own little cock rotation going.  Except men are the opposite, they wanna fuck as many women as humanly possible.  Like somehow that makes them a good in bed.  There should be a rule where it only counts if the girl still wants to fuck you after the first time. lol

I still want to have a great sex life, but I've never been good at keeping it a secret.  I definitely won't be doing a guy who has kids ever again.  Anytime I tell this guy about my sex life he gasps and mentions his daughter.  It always makes me feel really horrible.  I already felt cheap just being there I didn't need to feel ashamed for the things I've done with other people too.  I don't feel like I should keep my shit a secret.  Usually people get turned on when I tell them about my sexscapades.

And if he's so worried about his daughter maybe he should be just as worried about his son and how he might treat women in the future.  This guy took advantage of my situation like anyone else his age would.  Not that I feel that way about the situation, but I do have needs like any other woman, it shouldn't matter if they're a different kind.  None of the people I've seriously dated in the past wanted to fuck my ass, spank/paddle me, etc.  They just wanted something pretty to take to the movies, to show off for their friends and a smiling face to cum on.

What is so wrong with me being single and not wanting to be attached?  It's like you have to have a boyfriend now even to be kinky/polyamorous.  People don't trust you when you're single.  Either that or they think you're damaged goods which is even worse.  All single men have to worry about is people calling them perverts or creeps.

Yeah, and so he came in like 5 minutes too.  I'm convinced I freaked him out and he decided to just cum right away because that would be the only way to not hurt my feelings.  No, he didn't hurt my feelings, he just stifled my libido with his ever-shrinking dink.

He's still a nice guy but I hate people who think they've got me all figured out or treat me like I'm stupid without even realising it.  He said he felt bad for coming so soon and he gave me a nice backrub.  Now my back is sore when it wasn't before but it was a sweet gesture.

I remember my horoscope said I should say no to everything that day.  I could've said no on so many levels but oh well.  He seemed genuinely embarassed and I didn't know whether to stay or leave-which would be more/less humiliating.  I kind of knew it would get really awkward eventually, but I never thought it would be because of that.  hehe :p

So much for daddy/daughter roleplay.  I was hoping I'd get comfortable enough with him to try it, but it doesn't look like it.